Wanting Sex Again is couple’s therapy in a book. The author, Laurie Watson, has captured more than two decades of experience as a certified sex therapist and condensed the most essential elements gleaned from her work into this intelligent, relatable resource. This book is for women at any age or stage in their committed, heterosexual, monogamous relationships who have lost the desire to have sex with their partner. We also think men would also benefit from exploring the book, and couples might consider reading it together.
Most of the book includes detailed anecdotes of couples Watson has worked with at many different stages in their committed relationships, including newlyweds, new parents, those in second marriages, experiencing menopause and other changes due to aging, as well as issues around affairs and divorce. She shares dialog between partners with all the sting and nuance of real life relationships in conflict, along with sweet moments of breakthrough and re-connection. These stories might help readers identify with her clients and gain perspective on their own situation.
Watson also reveals her therapeutic process, including how she interprets behavior, slowly helps to unravel the knots and stuck patterns, and provides couples with suggestions and instruction to create change in their dynamic. Laurie is very skilled at digging into the reasons behind loss of libido and sex in a marriage, and readers will be guided to reflect on how family background, relationship history, and other emotional issues or beliefs might be an underlying problem.
We love the “Help Yourself” section at the end of each chapter, which offers exercises, reflective questions, and other useful prompts for putting new concepts to work in real life. Like any good therapist, her approach is never to take sides and to work towards a common goal of connection and intimacy. She doesn’t skirt around the intensity of these challenging, sensitive topics. But Watson also provides a realistic perspective on what is possible for those ready to do the rewarding work of making long-term relationships sexy and fulfilling.
Paperback. by Laurie Watson. 2012. 384 pages.